Cover Story - Top 10 Sabrina Covers

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I swear, at some point I’m just going to have to transition this blog into something that talks about comic book adaptations and nothing else.  It’s honestly kind of startling the explosion in comic book adaptations we’ve gotten over the last 5 years, even beyond the confines of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.  Case in point, today’s Cover Story will be looking at the top 10 covers featuring Sabrina, the Teenage Witch.  Most folks now probably know Sabrina from her ‘90s TV sitcom or the newly premiering Netflix series The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina but she actually has a long and storied career in the pages of Archie Comics.  

While rarely counted alongside the likes of DC, Marvel, and Image Archie Comics has absolutely dominated the non-superhero side of comic books since it set about imposing industry standards to kill its competition in that field (this is comic books people, there are no clean hands.)  While Archie and the rest of the Riverdale gang are their flagship crew they’ve also enjoyed a smattering of other long-lived successes, with Sabrina being core among them so let’s take a look at her top 10 comic covers.

Eternal Character Roster Revealed

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So, we’ve finally gotten a bit of an update on Marvel’s still happening Eternals movie.  Specifically, we know the film will be about the clash between the Eternals and their ancient enemies the Deviants and that Marvel will be aiming for colorblind casting, which is a pretty major positive.  We’ve also received a character breakdown of who to expect in the new film, though they’re basically just names at this point.  

However, there are some very surprising names on this list and some really out of left field descriptions worth digging into along with the more pedestrian choices for an Eternals movie.  What’s more, this seems as good a place as any to dive into the basics of the Eternals’ core characters.  So, let’s breakdown The Eternals character list.

Filmland - History of Horror & the Apocalypse

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As the fall season comes upon us once more it’s time for that spookiest of traditions: the new season of American Horror Story.  This year’s season will be about something that’s on everyone’s mind lately: the apocalypse.  The end of days is one of those primal fears that’s been with society pretty much ever since there was a society for us to fear the end of.  However, despite being a fairly ubiquitous terror and one that you’d think everyone held a stake in the Apocalypse’s place in the horror pantheon is actually pretty limited.  

Even setting up this timeline I’ve had to fudge want counts as “horror” a bit to include some stuff that’s more schlocky or was featured a lot in the old horrorathons that channels used to show around Halloween when I was a kid.  With that said, I did find enough apocalyptic horror material to create something of a timeline for the genre and how it reflects the anxieties and apocalyptic scenarios of the time.

Strange Chronicles - American Knight in Strike of the Centipede

         It’s summer in Bethlem, Pennsylvania, and the heat lingers over the town like a fever, seeping into the streets and alleyways of the rust belt metropolis.  Nights like this, even the rivers seems restless, swirling and changing under the rust-colored sky.  The sun has finally gone down and the entire city tries to breathe a sigh of relief as the dark envelops them.  The sounds of steel and chemical manufacturing slowly ebb away with the daylight hours, the factories in the North West barrens outside town empty of their workers even as their blood-colored smoke drifts skyward. 

         East Bethlem hums with fans and air conditioners from the towering high-rises and penthouses of the financial district, while further to the street hot jazz and cold neon fill the streets of the Chamberlain docks.  Across the river, on the North Bank where the Washington forks into Northward, the city heaves against the heat without such luxuries.  Hydrants burst, people sweat, and the only neon comes from the bright crosses of Mission Row.  Further North, just outside the city proper, is Parkland- once its own small town now swallowed up into the greedy giant that is the greater Bethlem metropolitan area. 

         They first built Parkland around the Red Wing Garden and Aviary in the center of the town, but then the factories moved in and by the time 1939 rolled around the rich had moved to the south to Four Towers and Sommerset and Parkland had become Bethlem’s own ghetto.  The Red Wing Garden was now just a forest in the middle of the city, surrounded on all sides by crumbling tenements and apartments.  Places like the Williamstown Arms, where Greg Wolfman tries desperately to get a little sleep.  It’s not the heat that keeps Greg awake- it’s the visions. 

         It’s been a month since she first appeared to him, first made herself and the truth known: Columbia, the living Goddess of America.  She’d appeared right there in Greg’s one-room apartment amid the leaks and the roaches and the sticky heat and all, glowing a radiant red, white, and blue.  She told him that he was to be her champion, that in every generation one must be chosen until the long midnight in America was over and that dawn was still nowhere in sight.  Greg didn’t know whether he was going insane or it had all been real, just that the next morning he found a costume, his “vestments,” lying at the foot of his bed. 

         Since then he’d worn them a few times, he’d seen the newsreels and read the papers about the folks in New Athens and Sharona- Mystery Men in colorful costumes righting wrongs and protecting the helpless: was that what Columbia wanted him to become?  If there was a Columbia at all, that is.  One thing was for certain, Greg wasn’t going to get any sleep, either way, might as well make the best of the night.  His costume was mostly blue, with red boots and hood, the shirt was made of chainmail and short sleeved, and it came with gauntlets that turned into knuckles made from Bethlem Steel.  As he put them on he could the voice of Columbia whispering in his ear again “to the West, that is where you are needed, my American Knight.” 

         Climbing the fire escape outside his window up to the roof, American Knight gazed to the West, towards the only place in Bethlem where the river was close enough together to build a crossing: The Narrows.  The Narrows was dark, its industry having migrated out to the Barrens a few years back, leaving behind a red light district, most of the city’s slums, and a series of abandoned factories that sat squat upon the riverfront.  However, right where the river widened and the Narrows gave way to the North Bank there was still light- the glittering lights of corporate labs and headquarters, their neon logos dotting the skyline as it scraped starward and definitively ended the Narrows.  That had to be where he was meant to go, but where?  Pulling a pair of binoculars from his belt he scanned the brick and concrete complexes looking for any sign of something amiss- he found it in the Spade Chemicals Building, 13^th Floor- it was awash in a strange green glow.

         Without hesitation, Greg leaped from his rooftop to the neighboring one, the mortar of the aging building threatening to give beneath him before relenting to his weight.  In all the times he’d bounded across the city roofs they’d never let him fall yet, it made him wonder if there really was someone looking out for him.  Racing across the Bethlem skyline, he made his way to the edge of the park- that’s where the train station was.  The elevated train was the pride of Bethlem, a series of different colored lines that were the only way to navigate the city as a whole thanks to the forking river splitting it into three sections.  

         Greg could see the Yellow Line to the Narrows preparing for its 11PM departure, filling up with skeleton crews for the corporate high rises and the occasional night shift steelworker.  The train was already beginning to move by the time Greg reached it, landing on the roof of the Parkland police precinct- a long flat building that ran parallel to the tracks.  As the bright lights atop the station silhouetted him against the giant police badge on the side of the building, American Knight hurled himself from the roof towards the train below. 

         He landed hard, but safe, his hands grabbing at the rough steel of the top of the train car.  He pulled himself to a kneeling position, scanning the skyscrapers for the Spade Chemicals building once more- it wasn’t hard to spot, the green glow from floor 13 had grown even stronger: a bright oasis of unnatural light in the darkness.  Quickly, his mind turned to ways to get into the building- security tended to frown on masked men just bursting in wherever they pleased even if they did wear the flag.  The Yellow Line turned a curve around Pickett’s Hill, bending towards the center of the Narrows, quickly drawing closer and closer to the building when Greg spotted the nearby construction site- that was his way in.  The Yellow Line was still on the curve, the only time he could risk leaping from the train as it slowed down to make its arc, spying a nearby billboard jutting from a nearby building.  Seizing the opportunity, he leaped from the train, hands finding purchase on the light fixtures that illuminated the advertisement.  Pulling himself atop it, he set out at full tilt for the vast steel skeleton of the construction site. 

         By the time he arrived at the site itself the glow on the 13^th floor had turned into an unearthly glare, even brighter than the neon signs and logos of the surrounding buildings.  Navigating the steel beams and thin wooden planks of the site, American Knight made his way to the side closest the Spade Chemicals building and the crane.  He’d used similar machinery during his time as a steelworker so he knew how to drive the giant piece of construction machinery, pointing it directly at the 13^th floor and turning its long neck into a bridge.  With as sure footing and fast a pace as he dared muster, he set off down the crane, headed right for the eerie green glow, speeding up as he approached the building and in one fluid motion leaping through the glass window of the 13^th floor. 

         The floor was a vast open laboratory floor, with strange vials and electrical machinery covering the walls and countertops.  In the center of the room stood a gang of five men in suits, faces covered with handkerchief masks, and a scientist in a white lab coat- his eyes covered by goggles.  Luckily for American Knight, the machinery around them was emitting a powerful hum that covered the sound of his entry and the entire gang of men was concentrated on the scientist’s actions as he manipulated a strange liquid that emitted the green glow.  Greg ducked behind a large piece of machinery that didn’t seem to be on, peering around it he saw the scientist hold up a glass dish with something scurrying inside of it.  He dripped a few drops of the green liquid onto the dish then gestured to the men to get back.  In an instant, the counter began to shake as the glass container shattered and a dark shape grew and grew. 

         By the time it was done the thing was the size of a large dog.  Looking closer, American Knight could see from the glow the thing was a giant cockroach.  The scientist smiled with triumph before fitting a leash to the giant insect and handing it to his companions.  With the flick of a switch, the humming subsided and the green light faded away to a soft glow from the vials of green liquid held by the scientist.  Without the humming American Knight could make out their conversation “So I guess this stuff really works huh Doc?” “Indeed, Herr Tausen will be pleased” Knight recognized the stiff practiced English as a German accent.  As the scientist packed the green liquid into a secure case Greg peered closer through the gloom and could make out an insignia on the side of it: a swastika, these men were Nazis. 

          At that moment, the American Knight decided he had to intervene.  He had seen the newsreels and read the reports of what these men were doing in Europe and knew whatever their purpose here was it must be sinister.  Springing forth from his hiding place he slammed full tilt into the biggest of the goons, knocking him into the banks of machinery.  Sparks flew everywhere as the man slammed backward, briefly illuminating the gloomy laboratory now that the glowing fluid had been stored away.  He could hear the scientist shouting in German as the other men moved around him.  Trusting in his ears, American Knight lunged to his left, his steel-clad fist striking hard in the stomach of one of the remain men.  Without a second to spare he grabbed the man by the collar, hurling him as hard as he could toward the spot where the scientist had been.  There was the sound of shattering glass followed by the return of that same eerie glow as the green liquid splattered across the room. 

         In the new light, Greg could see there were three thugs left, while their scientist friend was making his way for the exit.  The closest crook had already pulled a handgun from his jacket and was taking aim at Greg.  With lightning reflexes Greg pulled his gauntlets together in front of himself, the bullets ricocheting off their hardened steel.  One went wide and hit the man in the arm, he screamed and dropped the handgun just in time for American Knight to plow right into him- knocking him square into his companions.  As the three men struggle to stand up, Greg charged across the room to the elevator, the scientist desperately pushing the button to try and summon it faster. 

         Knight slammed into him, holding him up against the elevator doors with both hands; in his deepest voice, he snarled, “Alright Kraut, I want answers!  What’s in the case?  What’re you planning?”  The scientist wriggled in Knight’s grasp, sweat dripping down his goggles only for his look of panic to twist into a grin “What are we planning?  Your doom, Amerikaner.”  Suddenly, a powerful force slammed into the back of Knight’s legs, bringing him to his knees.  He could feel powerful cartilaginous legs scraping against the chain mail of his back and heard a terrible chittering from behind him- it was the giant cockroach, loose from its leash and set to protect its master.  Greg rolled, trying to wrestle the creature from off his back as its mandibles dug into the metal of his uniform.  The elevator door opened casting a beam of pale light on the scene as the scientist fled.  The two remaining goons had gotten to their feet and looked pointedly at their employer “See to it neither of them survives” said the scientist as the doors closed. 

         Hearing the two men approach, their guns drawn and cocked, America Knight summoned up all his strength, rising first to his knees then all the way to a stand, his back and the giant cockroach towards the men.  The thing was enraged, biting at him with all its might and he could feel the mail in his shirt starting to give.  With only moments before it gave way completely, he leaped back into the two men, slamming hard against the left one.  The cockroach began to shriek in confusion, twisting to focus its anger on the crook.  As soon as it released its clamp on Knight’s back he was turned around, steel gauntlets pressed against bug and men shoving them both hard towards the opposing wall- shoving and shoving till, with a shattering crash of the window, both of them exited the building down the 13 stories to the pavement below, landing with a wet gruesome thud. 

         The last of the crew stood alone among his fallen comrades as American Knight turned back to face him.  Faced with a savage beatdown of his own or compliance the man elected to throw his gun to the floor and put his hands in the air.  Approaching him slowly, Knight spoke, “The doctor…where is he headed?” The man pulled down his mask to speak more clearly “Across the river, he’s meeting his boss at the old abandoned Twin Stallions Steel Mill” “His boss, who’s that?” “I don’t know, another Kraut like him, they call him Centipede, it’s all I know I swear”  American Knight closed in on him, pulling handcuffs from his belt and chaining the man to a nearby countertop “for your sake, it better be” he said before ducking out the window back onto his makeshift bridge. 

         Within 30 minutes Greg was back atop the Yellow Line headed across the Washington River, the water shifting bellow him choppy and angry.  The South Bank of the Narrows was darker than its north side, the vast black shape of Mount Olivia blotting out the stars surrounding it.  Even through the midnight gloom American Knight could make out the Twin Stallions Steel Mill, abandoned since the explosion that had driven the city’s industry to the surrounding Barrens.  The giant hole in the side of the main building like a gaping wound still yawned into the night, the two wrought iron Stallions reared up in a whinny on either side of it.  The Yellow line slowed to a stop at the station, directly above the mill.  Leaping from the train onto the nearby rooftops, American Knight made his way down to the shattered factory below, slipping in through the broken wall.

         American Knight crept along the upper scaffolding of the factory floor towards the sluice basin that poured into the river outside.  He could hear voices coming from the foreman’s office below along with hints of that same green glow from Spade Chemicals.  Crawling onto along the pipes above the office he could see down through the absent roof the scientist was meeting with an unknown figure in full Nazi SS regalia along with a handful of additional goons.  They were speaking in a congratulatory tone and the man in the SS uniform was patting a glass box on a nearby desk with something inside.  The vials of formula were on the opposing wall.  Suddenly, the pipes underneath the American Knight gave way and he came crashing down into the office, landing on one of the men. 

         The remaining 3 surrounded him before he had a chance to get up, grabbing his arms.  The lead German looked him over before turning to the scientist “So, this is the American who gave you trouble at the laboratory, eh Herr Doctor Web?” the scientist nodded “And you’re the Centipede” spit back Greg, the Nazi immediately startled by his statement.  “So, our friend can talk eh? Bring him” The hired muscle dragged Greg down the stairs from the foreman’s office to the large pit in the middle of the factory floor.  It opened directly into the sluiceway designed to allow any dangerous run off to bleed into the river and be carried to the sea.  They held him at the edge, the Centipede taking his aim with his gun “It’s too bad you will not live to see the fruits of our labor” he said, as he set his glass case on the ground, the centipede within scurrying up the glass “When Dr. Web’s mutagen is applied to my pet it will grow to such a size that it will devastate this mockery of a city. Ah well,” he took aim at Knight’s head with his luger and fired…only for the pistol to produce the clicking of a jam. 

         In that moment of surprise, American Knight was up, shoulder checking his first captor and delivering a swift kick into the other.  The Centipede quickly managed to un-jam his gauntlet and began firing, Knight shielded himself with his gauntlets and tucked behind the last crook who took the bulk of the fire.  The man fell dead away onto the Knight, knocking them both into a pile of metal gears with a clang.  The Centipede quickly snatched the vial of growth serum from Dr. Web and pulled his pet centipede from its case.  “Your victory is fleeting American!”  With only seconds before he combined the insect and the chemicals, American Knight grabbed a nearby gear and hurled it as hard he could into the Nazi. 

         The vial shattered covering man and centipede in the glowing mutagen- he screamed, a shriek that modulated and shifted as his body began to morph, the centipede in his hands liquefying and spreading through his veins as they fused into one being.  The vertebrae of spine cracked and stretched as his body elongated, the skin of his arm turning to hard cartilage of an exoskeleton, his voice twisting into an insectoid chirp as a hard mandible burst from his cheek and his mouth began to stretch wider and wider.  Freeing himself from the gears and dead man, American Knight rushed towards the hideous twisting thing in the tattered SS uniform, slamming it with both his gauntlets. 

         As he pushed against it he could feel the same strength as from the giant cockroach but multiplied by at least 10 when the scratching clawing legs of an insect began to burst from the man’s growing side.  Summoning every ounce of strength left in him he pushed the creature as hard as he could towards the edge of the sluiceway.  Looking up he could see the transformation was beginning to settle and the hideous human centipede thing was staring down at him with hateful eyes, drawing back its claw-like arm for one final finishing swipe when suddenly the ground beneath it began to crumble- the foundations of the sluiceway gave out underneath the weight of the thing and it tumbled down into the blackened abyss. 

         Glancing around the darkened steel mill Dr. Web had disappeared into the night during the struggle.  That was alright, the American Knight would hunt him down another night, thought Greg as he made his way to the nearby emergency exit.  Leaving the main building, he made his way to the edge of the property, right where the outer lot gave way to a sheer drop to the river.  Dangling his legs over the side as he sat down, he took a moment to let the cool night air wash across his face, the sound of the rushing water fill his ears, the glittering neon and fluorescents of the city across the water filling up the night.  Greg would like to think the Centipede was gone for good but with all the strange things filling up the world lately he doubted it, the US’s midnight wasn’t over yet and so the American Knight wasn’t going anywhere. 

Strange Chronicles - Kid Brimstone in Flight of the Beast

There’s a chill in the air as the sun goes down outside Valley Lodge, Montana.  It’s the kind of smoky bite carried on the wind that tells you colder days are yet to come, the kind you get when October’s almost over and autumn along with it, with nothing left but long November nights and the cold harsh winds that blow across all that empty space.  It’s not a bitter cold, it’s not harsh enough to be bitter yet, just the promise of bitterness that makes you thankful there’s still a little bit of warmth left in the world, even as the vast slate grey clouds swirl across the sky and the sun slips below the long, flat horizon. 

The last lights cut across the vast corn and wheat fields of the little farming community now stripped bare and waiting for the next year’s planting.  Life moves in cycles in Valley Lodge- plant and harvest, spring and fall, new generations raised up in the fields till they became the old timers sitting on porches telling stories about when they were young, it’s a place that values its continuity and its traditions, traditions like tonight, October 31^st 1938- Halloween. 

Yes, Halloween, the one time of the year when things look the scariest and the whole world doesn’t look quite so frightening in comparison.  Even in the days of the dustbowl when they could see the huge storms blow to the South Valley Lodge found a place for this day, a single day to choose to be afraid.  Without homemade pastries and homemade costumes they’d sit under the flickering electric lamps and tell ghost stories late into the night about the old abandoned church on the way out of town, the lost mine somewhere in the foothills, and the scarecrows around the edge of the town.  That was last year though, not this year, this year prosperity had come back to Valley Lodge and things looked a little brighter as ghosts, witches, skeletons, and monsters prowled the streets asking for candy under the dimming sky. 

Cat Curtis watches from her window as the sun went down and the children navigate the town as the street lights buzz to life, the sky fading to a deep purple offset by the warm amber at the edge of the horizon line.  Soon, she’ll be heading out as well, she thinks to herself as she turns away from the window, fiddling with her costume- a red jumpsuit and black cape.  She falls back on her bed, her wooden devil’s mask sliding neatly into her side, its static face grinning outwards towards the darkening gloom. 

It’s been almost a year since she found the mask in the basement of the curiosity shop where she started working evenings, almost a year since she started wearing it and became Valley Lodge’s very own superhero.  Kid Brimstone the papers called her, a 15-year-old teen devil that fought crime and all manner of other things that go bump in the night.  The old folks always said Valley Lodge had someone looking out for it on account of all the weird tales the town had survived, just most folks had figured that “someone” was a teen girl turned teen demon. 

Standing up, mask in hand, Cat slowly pressed it to her face, feeling the slight tingle through her body as the air began to crackle around her.  Slowly, the mask fused to the young girls face, the wood softening into tough skin over her own as her body twisted as well, her legs crooking, her toes fusing and solidifying into hooves, her fingernails jutting further and further out into claws, she could feel the horns of the mask fusing to her forehead when fire engulfed her entire body, completing the transformation from Cat Curtis, high school girl, into Kid Brimstone, defender of the night. 

Perching herself on the windowsill, the twilight breeze cool and refreshing across her now demonic face, she leapt forth with a powerful thrust of her hooves, loping from branch to branch through the grove of trees that backed her family’s home, till eventually, she landed on the roof of the town church.  Skittering her way up the imposing steeple, she reached the top and paused, gazing out over the entirety of the little town of Valley Lodge, seeing it all laid out in front of her as the twilight finally gave way to the night and the street lamps formed the rows and columns that made up the small town. 

Most places like this wouldn’t see much trouble, even on Halloween, but Valley Lodge isn’t most places, it’s a weird place where weird things happen, the kind of places where things you can’t explain tend to fill up all the empty space that is America, and on this Halloween night weird things were definitely afoot.  It began with a scream on Chestnut and Main, by the hardware store.  Cat could feel the thing before it happened, the crackle of otherworldly malevolence through the still fall air that only a demon could sense, even if it didn’t help Old Man Wilson any. 

As fast as she was, Kid Brimstone didn’t get there till the old time was just a puddle on the soft dirt of the Montana country road.  Her eyes glowing with infernal fire as she scanned the scene, Cat could hear the soft wailing of Valley Lodge’s only police car approaching in the distance.  After a year of her appearances the Sheriff and the townsfolk had come to accept her as a guardian, even if she did look exactly like the kind of thing you learn to fear in Sunday school.  It helped that she was the only one who could help in the strange cases, like how does a man fall to his death in the middle of the street? 

By the time Sheriff Arnold got there a crowd was developing, Kid Brimstone always brought a crowd whenever she bounded through the streets and Mr. Wilson’s screams had been hard to ignore.  Cat knew the sheriff could handle the details- deputizing men to clear the area, sending someone to find the town doctor, that he would look to her to explain what happened, to make it right.  She could see him moving through the crowd, intent on her position when a second scream rang out in the night. 

Unwilling to wait for the Sheriff, Cat leaped into the air, a ring of brimstone fire left in the middle of the street where she took off.  Landing on the roof of the hardware store, she peered through the absolute blackness of the sky above the town, her infernal vision lighting the way.  Through the depths of the blackness, near the old Peachtree place, she could make out a shape, a vast thing that glowed in her eyesight, the way only evil does when you look through the eyes of hell, and though its shape was unclear, in its claw-like hands Cat could make out the soft blue that marked an innocent life. 

In a second she was off, leaping from roof to roof towards the Peachtree family farm, eyes locked skyward as the thing circled overhead.  As she got closer the thing began to take a more definitive shape- it was big, big as a truck, but shaped like a man, though the proportions were all wrong.  Its arms were thick but it had no hands, only claw-like spikes from each forearm, and its legs turned into talons at the thigh.  It had no head but a thick shoulder muscle extending across its top, with a single lidless eye set in its vast and a drooling maw at the middle of its chest, with huge leathery batwings keeping it aloft in the Montana night.  Cat searched her mind for what the creature could be, from where it might’ve come, in her demonic form she knew all that hell knew and could find any answer, though there were some questions she dared not ask. 

With a hard thud Kid Brimstone landed on the roof of the Peachtree farm, the old tiling of the roof bending under her hooves as she scanned the skies for the thing.  She spotted it in the Northwest corner, headed towards the old railway mail station, and in its claws was Danny Peachtree, 8 years old and dressed like a cowboy.  Exhaling as she bent her legs, hands clenched into tight fists of devilish power, Cat summoned up all her strength and in a single leap launched herself into the creature- ramming it square in the back. 

The horrible thing let out a monstrous cry, like a train derailing but somehow much deeper.  Instantly the creature dropped the boy and he began to fall.  Digging her claws into the thing’s back, right at the joint of the leathery wings, Kid Brimstone angled herself downward and launched herself into the night after Danny- catching him in mid-fall.  The boy was terrified- taken by some alien creature and now rescued by a literal devil from hell, it was all Cat could do to hold onto him.  She didn’t have the free hand to use her cape to glide downwards and couldn’t risk the creature taking the opportunity to attack her from behind, so she curled her body around the struggling boy, holding him tight and trusted in gravity to do the hard work of getting them down. 

The two hit the ground hard, though Danny took the landing a lot better thanks to Cat than he would’ve otherwise.  In her demon form nothing could truly damage her but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be hurt, and falling about 4 stories straight down definitely hurt.  Shaking the pain and the dust from her horns, Cat slowly rose to her hooves, surveying her surroundings.  The town was behind her, not too far, with nothing but barren fields and flat Earth surrounding them.  

In the distance she could make out the water tower of the abandoned railroad mail station…and there atop the tower was the thing, looking right back at her.  As soon as it saw Cat the thing began to howl, low and guttural yet also metallic, the kind of sound that cuts right through you as plain and truly wrong.  Looking down at Danny, the frightened little boy she just saved who still looked terrified, she said to him in her least demonic tone “Get Behind Me.”  The young boy did as he was told, shuffling behind Kid Brimstone’s cape as planted her hooves to face in the direction of the thing.

In one smooth motion, the thing took flight off the water tower, its massive batwings sending dust whirling through the air as it began to circle its attacker.  Kid Brimstone’s eyes started to burn as her mind whirled through infernal knowledge.  Cracking her fingers as she began to whisper arcane tones, ancient and infernal symbols forming in the air around her hands when, in one motion, she clapped them together and pulled them forth, red energy arching between them then settling into the form of a pitchfork which she grasped firmly. 

She’d finally been able to place the creature, it was a being of chaos- primordial magic, the kind of weird anti-geometry that’s hard to work and even harder to control.  That gave her an edge, knowing what the creature was…and knowing what it could do.  She braces herself, pitchfork held outward in both hands defensively as the Chaos Beast circled closer and closer, its pink outer flesh glistening wetly in the moonlight while the deep black cartilage of its claws disappeared against the inky blackness of the night sky.  All at once, its single eye began to glow a sickly green, energy pouring forth from its maw and then its entire body until finally a bright beam of pure chthonic energy shot forth from its single eye. 

The beam hit Kid Brimstone square in the pitchfork, splintering on impact as the crimson fire of her staff deflected the otherworldly blast.  All around her the dust and dirt of the Montana countryside was beginning to give way to the chaos energies unleashed by the thing- odd angles twisting out of the dirt, dust that was one second made of flesh and then diamonds before settling back to dust again.  This fight had to end quickly, the longer the Chaos Beast was allowed to roam free the more it would twist the world to resemble its own.  Taking a deep breath and waiting for the creature to glide close to her, Kid Brimstone took aim and breathed a massive jet of hellfire directly into the thing.  

The Beast was caught off guard, screaming as the unholy flames covered it, its eye blasting forth that green beam in any direction it could to try and stem the tide of flames that consumed it.  Taking advantage of the Beast’s distraction, Cat pulled back her arm, taking aim with her pitchfork and whispering a new spell into her weapon before hurling it directly into the Beast’s chest.  It hit with a loud wet thump, embedding itself deep in the pink flesh of the Chaos Beast, before shooting forth burning red chains from the handle, staking themselves to the ground and pinning the Beast to that spot. 

Cat knew the chains wouldn’t hold the Chaos Beast for long, turning to Danny behind her, who now seemed far less frightened of his devilish rescuer, she said “run!” and sent the boy racing back towards the welcoming lights of the town.  With Danny in the wind, Cat turned back towards the railway station, leaping towards it as the Chaos Beast shrieked and wailed and raged against her binding spell.  Cat knew whatever had brought this creature into the world had originated at the rail station, that it was still keeping the Beast in our plane, and that if she could destroy it- this would all be over. 

The station wasn’t large, just a single building and the water tower, but the track had been used as a railway graveyard ever since being abandoned nearly a decade ago.  Nearly a dozen abandoned and broke down rail cars now peppered the land beside the rail station- engines that had exploded, end cars that broke and rolled off the tracks, and the boxcars you just couldn’t use anymore.  One of them had to be where this was coming from, Cat thought, as she sailed through the air, scanning the yard with her infernal vision.  It turned out she didn’t need magic eyes to see the source of her problems: at the far end of the yard was a single boxcar, covered in rust and overgrown, out of which poured that same green glow as from the creature.  Landing hard on a nearby caboose with a shattered frontend, Cat could hear, in the distance, the last of her infernal chains snapping and the triumphant bellow of the Chaos Beast as it took flight and headed towards her. 

Kid Brimstone sprinted for the boxcar as fast as her hooves could carry her, the dense flapping of bat-wings getting closer and closer with each second.  The wood of the car’s closed-door splintered as she dove into it, somersaulting across the floor as she landed.  There in the car she found what she was looking for- a corpse.  It looked to be the corpse of a drifter, some nameless hobo who’d posted up in the boxcar.  

Something had happened to him though, something bad: both his eyes were gone and a weird geometric pattern had been formed on his chest- partly it had grown forth from inside him in the form of splintered bones and partly it had been carved onto his chest by some unknown blade.  The old tramp’s body pulsed in its own unnatural glow, his face frozen in terror at whatever thing had taken his eyes and made him into a doorway to someplace that couldn’t fit this world. 

For just a second Kid Brimstone hesitated, wondering how she could possibly close this door, searching her mind for what infernal tool could fit this task when suddenly the roof of the boxcar was torn upwards.  The black cartilaginous talons of the Chaos Beast ripped through the metal of the roof like it was nothing, hurling chunks of the disused boxcar into the nearby fields as it dug deeper and deeper trying to reach its tormentor.  Panicked for a moment, Cat dropped to the floor, pressing herself as far below the Chaos Beast’s grasp as she could.  The frustrated cries of the Chaos Beast filled the air as it tore and rent downwards; till the roof of the boxcar was removed enough it could press its eye to the hole.  

It fixed Cat with that eye, deep and unnatural green, impossible shapes swirling within its pupil as chthonic energy filled the car.  The Beast was only a few feet away from Cat now, she could hear the crackle of energy from its eye, feel the heat of its ragged breath from that slavering maw, she knew it was preparing to burn her with its gaze, to render her down to pure chaos and remove her from this plane, so in one swift motion she brought her claws through the remaining box car metal- scratching across the Beast’s eye. 

The thing’s shriek was so loud Cat could feel blood spurt from her ears.  She had bought herself a few seconds as the Beast recoiled, its deadly eye no longer fixed on her, and in those seconds Cat knew what she had to do.  As she readied herself, searching for the right spell, she suddenly felt the boxcar lurch and shift under her.  The massive talons of the Beast burst through the far wall and suddenly the entire car was on its side as it began to lift into the air.  Scrambling out the hole in the ceiling, Kid Brimstone watched as the ground quickly faded off as the Chaos Beast flew her and the boxcar higher and higher, the moon in full ascendance framing their flight when suddenly- the ascent stopped and she began to fall. 

Digging her claws into the roof of the car and trying not to panic, Kid Brimstone pulled herself out of the car, planting her hooves in the rusting metal and riding the falling hunk of machinery downward, even as the corpse door rattled within.  Shouting her incantations loudly and defiantly against the rushing wind of her fall, she moved her hands quickly in the air, hell’s amber glow and infernal runes forming as she drew the symbol of her spell.  On the ground, just below Cat and her boxcar chariot, a circle of flames began to form, spinning faster and faster till the ground fell away beneath it revealing a vast crimson inferno- it was hell, a portal to hell that Cat had summoned.  

High above, she could hear the cries of frustration and dismay from the Chaos Beast as it swooped downward, now desperate to stop its missile from plunging into the hell mouth.  Grasping the metal roof as hard as she could, Kid Brimstone turned to face her attacker, its vast pink form a blur of oncoming motion.  Allowing a quick smirk to cross her lips, even as the Beast drew nearer, she drew in a deep breath and a jet of fire shot forth from her mouth- engulfing the creature and propelling the car down even faster. 

Finally, with seconds to spare, she kicked herself free from the car, her black velvet cape spread wide to catch the wind as she sailed free of the otherworldly boxcar.  Turning back as she drifted through the air, she could see the green glow within fade as it tumbled into the waiting hell mouth, which closed shut almost immediately.  Its connection to its own geometry shattered, the Chaos Beast’s body began to fall apart in mid air- its pink skin evaporating into a dark green dirt, the crackling energy of its eye fading to a dim grey, its final shriek of defiance caught in its quickly decaying throat till soon it was nothing but dust on the October wind.

Landing gently at the foot of the railway water tower, Cat allowed herself to finally relax, leaning back against the ancient wood of the abandoned structure.  The Chaos Beast was vanquished but the mystery of who unleashed it using that poor drifter as a corpse door still remained but that was tomorrow’s problem, for now, she would savor her victory before returning home to her family and bed and returning to the form of Cat Curtis- another spook bites the dust thanks to Kid Brimstone. 

Marvel Announces Eternals Film

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So, let’s talk about The Eternals.  These folks are, allegedly, going to be Marvel’s next big thing going into phase 4 and the 2020s.  I use the word “allegedly” there because I feel like we’ve definitely been here before and done the “next big thing” dance enough times for it to feel decidedly old hat by now.  In particular, we were last here in 2017 when Marvel spent 2 years and countless comics trying to make the Inhumans into their next big thing only for the property to completely flame out after ½ a season of subpar television.  

Even if you LIKED the Inhumans TV show there’s no denying the concentrated effort to rebrand the Inhumans as the new it thing from Marvel was both a failure and embarrassment, especially with how much they’ve receded from the public eye at this point.  One wonders if the Eternals, a very similar group conceptually, aren’t just Marvel’s new flavor of the month, to be forgotten within a few short years of their culmination? 

Panel Vision - 2001: A Space Odyssey

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Today marks the 50^th anniversary of the premiere of Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey, one of the pinnacles of weird speculative sci-fi films of the late ‘60s alongside the likes of Planet of the Apes and Soylent Green.  The film actually wasn’t a huge success immediately upon release but slowly became a cult classic, allegedly because audiences of stoners would enjoy tripping out to the psychedelic images on display.  

The film proved popular enough to warrant getting a comic book adaptation by the king of comics himself: Jack Kirby.  Kirby liked doing the comic so much and it did so well for Marvel that this led into a new ongoing comic by Kirby exploring his own interpretation of the Monolith and the attendant 2001: A Space Odyssey mythos, which is what I’ll be looking at today. 

Panel Vision - Foolkiller (2017)

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Happy April Fools everyone, if there can really be such a thing.  I’ve elected to celebrate this most ignominious holiday by delving deep into the “fool” part of the name with a look at one of my favorite superhero G-listers: Foolkiller.  Created in 1974 in the pages of Man-Thing by the incomparable Steve Gerber, Foolkiller is one of the many bizarre no-name characters that tend to pepper the lower tiers of the Marvel echelon.  He’s best described as a more comedic version of the Punisher, largely because Steve Gerber was one of the premiere funnymen of ‘70s Marvel comics (he invented Howard the Duck, after all.) 

From those humble beginnings Foolkiller’s actually been re-imagined about 4 different times, once as a hardcore murder vigilante with a weird bondage gimp costume, once in the Marvel mature readers line MAX Comics, and once as part of Deadpool’s expansive entourage.  I’m going to focus today on the last of those three, the Greg Salinger Foolkiller, and his short-lived five-issue comic from 2016 written by Max Bemis, drawn by Dalibor Talajic, and colored by Miroslav Mrva. 

Panel Vision - 7 Possibilities for Black Panther 2

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So, by now Black Panther is a bona fide hit, one of the biggest films of the year and on track to be one of the biggest films of all time frankly.  As such a sequel is now pretty much all but inevitable.  Indeed, our very idea of the superhero is probably going to have to start adapting to this new post-Black Panther age: it’s a milestone movie much in the same vein as Superman, Batman, Spider-Man, Iron Man, the Dark Knight, Captain America: The Winter Soldier, or Deadpool.  

I get the unique sense Black Panther is going to basically be Marvel’s license to print money going forward into the 2020s so it’s time to milk this particular topic for all its worth by diving into the next big question for Black Panther: what do you do next?  Obviously, anything is on the table and the events of Infinity War are probably going to reshape things quite a bit as well but I think I’ve got a few ideas for 7 characters we might see in Black Panther 2.

Cover Story - Top 10 Black Lightning Covers

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Another week another CW show to pay close attention to.  Seriously, as much as I love the expanding CWniverse I’m going to have start dedicating this entire blog to following their vast exploits now they’ve added a 5^th show to the lineup.  If you’re unfamiliar with the new series it’s called Black Lightning and revolves around Jefferson Pierce, a teacher, and father with electrical powers and a tendency to take on the establishment.  

Jefferson’s had a long and storied carrier in the comics from early solo comics to being a core part of the Batman team The Outsiders to his role as Secretary of Education for President Luthor all the way to being a member of the Justice League of America.  Given that lengthy time I’ve decided to celebrate his new series with a bit of a cross-section of Black Lightning’s work with a look back at the top 10 comic covers, he’s starred in.

Panel Vision - All-Star Squadron #38-40

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As we enter the middle point of January, depictions of racism and marginalized races, especially black people, has become something of a running focus in the popular discourse.  This particular subject has been at the forefront for a while, ever since the Internet-enabled marginalized fans to demand greater representation on panel and behind the scenes in superhero comics, but this is somewhat unique.  

With both Black Lightning and Black Panther poised to remake the superhero genre in their own image, DC Comics has announced plans for screenwriter John Ridley (12 Years A Slave, Let It Fall) to write a new comic chronicling the stories of DC’s marginalized entitled The Other History of the DC Universe.  This is a great idea and it’s got me thinking about the VAST number of DC heroes who fit this dynamic and I settled on one story, in particular, that’s unique even among the annals of DC comics: All-Star Squadron’s Detroit is Dynamite.