Cover Story - Top 10 More Christmas Covers

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Happy holidays and good tidings y’all, Lord knows we could all use some better days this year.  Yes, once again it tis the Christmas season and once again I’ll be diving into the deep well of Christmas comics.  I don’t actually celebrate Christmas myself but seeing as there’s a real dearth of Hanukkah comics to delve into I figured it’d be better to stick with Christmas.  

After all, the yuletide season is such an ingrained part of the yearly calendar it ends up forced into nearly every comic book at some point, and that can make for some pretty hilarious and horrible mismatched covers, as we’re about to see.  So let’s all get in the Christmas spirit for a bit with the top 10 MORE Christmas Comic Covers.

Panel Vision - The Lobo Paramilitary Christmas Special

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There’s a Lobo Christmas Movie; did you know that?  I didn’t, and I certainly wasn’t planning to review it before stumbling blindly upon the thing a few days ago while researching a Cover Story.  While not technically falling under any official DC/WB canon and only lasting 13 minutes this thing does exist and was merely memory holed out of collective consciousness.  

Given the short running time this “review” is going to be on the brief side and more about explaining how this happened than reviewing the actual quality of the “film.”  However, the entire movie is up on youtube and is protected under fair use so go ahead and give it a watch if you're curious to know what you’re in for before my explaining how this bizarre link of pop culture sausage got made.

Panel Vision - Master Men

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As I write this, it is the midst of December 2016- the dark times, as I presume future us will refer to the latter half of the 2010s.  In the middle of the long dark night of the nation’s soul comes a thoroughly ironic television event- season 2 of Amazon’s Man in the High Castle.  

The series is one of several prestige streaming shows produced in the wake of Netflix’ breakout success with original programming like House of Cards and Orange is the New Black.  High Castle, as it’s often shortened to, is an adaptation of a Philip K. Dick book of the same name from 1963 about an alternate history where the Axis won World War 2. 

These days “what if the Nazis won” is more colloquially known as “the 2016 election” so getting a whole TV show out of Nazi-ified Americana has decidedly lost its luster for the second season.  However, the event gives me a chance to dive into the comics backlog to once again talk about one of my favorite comics characters of all time: Uncle Sam.  Not only that, this is Uncle Sam’s latest adventure, going head-to-head with a Nazi version of the DCU in a tale aptly called…Master Men. 

Cover Story - Top 10 Darth Vader Covers

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This Friday marks a rather auspicious occasion- the premiere of Rogue One, A Star Wars Story.  Despite the mouthful of a name this promises to be a pretty big deal all around.  Rogue One is the first of an entire prospective franchise of Star Wars spin-offs and side-quels Disney would like to start releasing in between (and presumably after) the main series films.  What’s more, Rogue One is a unique entity as it’ll be the first time this decade we’ll see Darth Vader on screen.  

Much like A Force Awakens, Vader’s return is punctuated with some significant uncertainty after a decade’s worth of “NOOO!” jokes and cameos in Night at the Museum.  That makes his return here a major stepping stone for Disney, a point to prove that not only is Star Wars back but it's redeemed its more troubled elements.  Of course, for comic fans Darth Vader has been “back” since last year when he got a hot new comic series from Marvel.  Given his return to the big screen, I’ve elected to honor man and series here today. 

Fate of the Furious Trailer Breakdown

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The Fast & the Furious, what can you say about it at this point?  Spanning 8 films and an expanding roster of heroes it’s one of the biggest film franchises in the world right now that’s isn’t based on a pre-existing property.  It’s the last bastion of old school action movie aesthetics in the blockbuster scene with not a hint of robots, ray guns, wizards, capes or any of the high concept genre fare that’s become the bread and butter of the tent pole season. 

A star vehicle series to keep both the Rock and Vin Diesel relevant no matter how many mediocre fantasy films or action comedies they do in their spare time, as well as boasting the most diverse roster of actors in any major Hollywood production.  Now, the team rejoins for their 8^th installment (!!!) and first made in the wake of Paul Walker’s untimely passing, a dark and compelling adventure that pits them against their greatest enemy yet. 

Spider-Man: Homecoming Trailer Breakdown

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No character more embodies the state of Marvel Studios at this moment in time like Spider-Man does.  On the one hand, he’s a multi-billion dollar franchise and ranks among the likes of Batman and Superman as some of the most influential and well-known heroes on the planet.  I mean, lest we forget, Spider-Man has had 5 mega-budget solo movies, a ton of TV shows, and even appears in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade- he’s one of the few characters that acts as an ambassador of the entire genre of superheroes.

On the opposite hand, he hasn’t had a good solo movie since 2004 and his past 2 bombs were so explosive they threatened to drag the entire franchise down to the bottom of the sea.  What I’m saying is that Spider-Man occupies the unique space of being essentially a sure thing but with enough franchise dead weight to seem like a risky venture, which is the exact Venn diagram center point Marvel Studios thrives in.  And, with our first look at the new Spider-Man: Homecoming trailer, thriving looks be exactly what Marvel’s up to. 

War for the Planet of the Apes Trailer Analysis

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This hasn’t come up previously, but I have a…strained relationship with the Planet of the Apes.  It’s one of those sci-fi properties that I didn’t really care for when I was younger, but that’s more to do with my own ignorance than the actual quality of the film series.  Since then I’ve gained a new appreciation for the series throughout its many incarnations while still holding a grudge over certain issues.  Predominately, I’ve always had a problem with the franchise’s tendency to favor “because of shut-up” as the grease that keeps the story wheels going. 

I’m not saying I can’t roll with talking apes or solar time travel, more that the apes are just able to beat the humans because shut-up they can.  That was a big part of my problem with Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, to the point I straight up turned on the monkeys by the end of the film.  As such, I’m holding their new entry at a bit of an arm’s length but this opening trailer definitely has me back on board.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 Trailer Breakdown

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Somewhere around 3 years ago, Marvel Studios introduced the world to the Guardians of the Galaxy, a plucky band of space rogues who wormed their way into everyone’s hearts with their winning combination of humorous banter and space weirdness.  

Now, Marvel prepares for the Guardians next out, coming spring 2017, with a brand new trailer.  However, a lot can change in 3 years, and the world of 2017 is going to be very different for the Guardians. 

The original film was such a cultural shame it’s shaped a lot of the competition to come out since, both concerning renewed interest in space operas, also shepherded along by the return of Star Wars, and a greater attempt to co-opt the Guardians’ eclectic style, as evidenced by Suicide Squad.  

Given that and Marvel’s less unassailable standing in the current landscape, does the Guardians trailer promise the triumphant return of the kings of the MCU, or were our heroes never quite as fun as we initially thought?

Transformers: The Last Knight Breakdown

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I am incredibly fascinated with the Transformers films.  I need to be clear here because a lot of people tend to mistake “fascinated” with “fond of,” which I am most certainly not.  The first Transformers movie was a long, dull slog through mediocrity followed up by the abysmal second film that actually rubbed its balls in audiences faces and then a return to abject mediocrity for the conclusion of the original trilogy. 

However, I actually didn’t mind Age of Extinction, it was no great shakes, but it was better than what had come before and at best I considered it entertaining, which certainly put it ahead of a lot of its contemporaries in 2014.  Now we’ve got TF5 AKA The Last Knight.  Can this fifth installment finally provide the Transformers film fans have been clamoring for is it, at long last, time to admit that’s never going to happen?

The Mummy Trailer Breakdown

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Let’s talk for a second about “cinematic universes.”  The idea of cinematic universes is a pretty new concept for most general audiences, but it actually finds its origins with the so-called Universal Monster Cycle.  

This was a collection of films produced in the ‘30s and ‘40s by Universal Studios and are considered the first major horror hits of the talking picture era.  Basically, our universally held conceptions of Frankenstein, Dracula, the Mummy, the Wolfman all come from these movies, and they all ended up sharing continuity with each other. 

The big reason for this was that aside from being owned by the same studio, each of the monster movies had a unique style while still fitting together as a cohesive whole.  That’s always been the secret of the cinematic universe, and now, 85 years later, Universal seems to have forgotten it as they return to this particular well with 2017’s The Mummy.

Kong: Skull Island Trailer 2 Analysis

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One of the more obnoxious trends of the 2010s is every studio under the sun trying to scare up a bit of the Marvel shared universe magic.  While I like the Marvel movies, I do think people put a little too much stock in their shared universe angle being why they’re successful.  The truth is that if Iron Man, Avengers, or Civil War hadn’t been good movies all the continuity in the world wouldn’t have saved them; see The Incredible Hulk. 

While there are a lot of reasons studios have come to obsess over shared universes none of them seem to be the thing that actually makes shared universes fun.  See, studios love shared universes for the online marketing hype machine of clues and threads or the way it brings syndicated storytelling to the movies, making films binge-able when the thing that makes them fun is that they allow several different genres to co-exist.  This is where Kong: Skull Island comes in. 

Logan Trailer Analysis

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I’ve made no secret of the fact I don’t like the X-Men films.  What’s more, I’ve also made it pretty clear that even though I enjoy the original Chris Claremont, John Byrne, Dave Cockrum, Louise Simonson, and Jackson Guice comics I’ve had a lot of problems with the core metaphor and overall quality of the X-Men comic mythos.  In the midst of all that bile I haven’t really address the big angry elephant in the room that is Wolverine.  I’m hard pressed to think of a character that looms larger in the realms of Marvel history than Wolverine. 

He’s been on nearly every superhero team, had countless solo comics, and spawned a media merchandising empire that, for a time, was a rival of the Batman’s.  Personally, I’ve never actually seen the allure.  Don't get me wrong, I like Wolverine as part of the X-Team dynamic, but his solo series have never seemed as interesting or mature as they’re often meant to be, and his movies always come off as squandered potential…until Logan, because this film looks amazing. 

The Belko Experiment Trailer Analysis

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Let’s talk about James Gunn.  Before 2014’s smash hit Guardians of the Galaxy Gunn was a bit of an unknown.  He had made a few good movies, most notably Super and Slither which undoubtedly endeared him to the film geek in everyone’s life, but he wasn’t necessarily a sought after auteur filmmaker.  That’s been true of a lot of Marvel’s collection of misfit and maverick directors, with the most common thread being a cult success like Joss Whedon’s Firefly or the Russo Brother’s work on Community. 

Now, however, Gunn is a name in Hollywood, and that means he’s got the kind of clout to do what he wants now.  Most Marvel directors go through this period, some coming out stronger like Jon Favreau giving us Chef and The Jungle Book while others squander the chance, like Alan Taylor following up Thor: The Dark World with Terminator Genisys.  As for Gunn, while Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 is on his plate, his real follow-up effort has taken the form of a grimy horror flick called The Belko Experiment.